Thursday, November 21, 2013

Dear Zianne {two months}

Dear Zianne,

Well, sweet girl, it's been two months. And this is what I can tell you... I know you, little lady. I truly know you. I know your ins and outs. I know how to make you smile, and I can anticipate your impending fussiness minutes before it starts. I know which nights you will be so tired you will fall asleep instantly and which nights you will need to be rocked and soothed for a few extra minutes. I know how you like to be held and how you like your little bum patted if you are falling asleep in my arms. I know late morning is your favorite time of day. I know you like to hang out in the Ergo, but you are over the swing and the bouncy chair, at least when it comes to nap time. I know your restless kicks mean you are getting tired, and that you like to rest your hand on the safety strap when cruising in the stroller. I know all these little things about you, and I love learning each new quirk as your personality unfolds. I know you. And I love you.

And that makes me think, little one. How much more does God know me? He knows my weaknesses, fears, joys, and frustrations better than I know them myself. He knows the way I bite my lip when I am doing something athletic and the way I crinkle my forehead {to the dismay of my thirty-one year old skin} when I am deep in thought. He made my lips and my forehead and this whole body that was able to carry you and bring you into the world. And He knows what the day will hold before I do, and how I will respond to each challenge or joy that comes my way. He knows if it will be a day of tears as I persevere through these early, exhausting weeks of motherhood. He knows if it will be a day of happiness, where you nap well and I feel like I got a few things done around the house. He knows the grace I will need for the circumstances I can't even foresee. He knows me. And He loves me.

And He knows you, sweet child. He created you. He knit you together in my womb, and watching the intricacies of His handiwork for these past two months has been utterly miraculous. He knows your desires and hopes now, long before you will know them yourself. And He knows all the days He has set forth for you. The dreams you'll dream. The temptations you'll face. The ways you'll fall short and the ways He will graciously pick you back up. He knows how to comfort you more than my soothing sway ever could. He knows how to bring you a deeper joy than my silly faces do each morning. He knows how to protect you far better than I ever could, even if I read all the parenting guides in the world. He knows you. And He loves you.

Love always,

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